You’re not here on earth to be hot.  Is that strange to hear?   If that’s not our main purpose, then why does it seem every media medium is trying to tell us that this should be our top priority?      If I’m not called to be hot, then what on earth am I called to?


Ever think, “I used to be pretty”, or “I wish I was beautiful?”    I’m finding a lot of women echo the same statement.


Just the other week I was looking through photos of me in my late 20’s.  I couldn’t help but think, “Wow!  I was so…. thin!”    I can’t believe that back then I thought I was chubby.  I started scrutinizing myself then compared to now.  Well that’s just not fair.  Back then I was kid-less and in my 20’s!  We’re talking pre-grey hairs, pre-aftermath baby flubber, pre….   Now I know its time to hit the hair salon when my bunch, not just a few, a BUNCH, of grey hairs show up (they’ve migrated to my eyebrows too.  Who gets grey in their EYEBROWS??)   Now, instead of looking for my skinny’s I’m looking for my spanks….


Many mourn the weight they were back in their teens.   There’s where I can find some comfort.  I was very heavy as a teen.  I actually weigh less post-2nd baby, so I can’t empathize with those gals.  But I understand mourning past weight from before baby.  I have all these awesome clothes that I can’t fit into.  For now, I’m stuck with my 2 outfits that actually fit…  And God-forbid, the other day I checked myself in a 3 way mirror.  IS MY BUTT REALLY THAT BIG?? …. and for heavens sake, why did someone not tell me I have a double chin?!


I saw this status on facebook today and almost fell over laughing: I figured out why I’m fat! The shampoo I use in the shower that runs down my body says “For extra volume and body”. I’m going to start using “Dawn” dish soap. It says ” Dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove”


I got the answer, gals!  It’s time for a makeover!   Let’s head to the mall and get ourselves an age-defying spa experience so we can look like Jennifer Lopez (who makes me SICK!  That woman can’t be 42!)  Then we’ll hook ourselves up with a new wardrobe, and we’ll leave the mall feeling like rock stars….. until we see the visa bill….. until our HUSBANDS see the visa bill….. until a day later when we’re back to that ol’ frumpy feeling…..


What?  Wouldn’t a visit to the spa and some new clothes make us feel like new?  For a moment, but it soon fades.   It seems like it would be just what the doctor ordered, but it never satisfies.


I think there comes a time when we need to embrace ourselves beyond our expectations and comparisons.   We expect so much from ourselves, yet if you ask me who I know who I find truly breathtakingly beautiful, the first people I think of aren’t necessarily who Vogue would choose for a front cover.   They don’t even feel all that “hot”, yet when I see their radiance, they are so…. beautiful.


It sounds cheesy and like it’s the right thing to say, but its true isn’t it?  Think about those you know you find “beautiful”.    There are girls who may be hot by the world’s standards, but that perfect outer appearance can get mangled by a really self-centered personality.  All of a sudden, they’re not as beautiful as first envisioned.


I’m not saying we just let ourselves go.  I think healthy eating (not like the whole pan of brownies I just ate…) and some exercise is something we all need.   First of all, it makes us feel a ton better about ourselves.  I can be 10 pounds heavier than I’d like, but when I’m eating well and exercising, I feel good despite!  And honestly, I think some reading this blog need to invest a little in yourself with a new shirt or a facial.  Moms always take care of themselves last.   Don’t you think that could be feeding how frumpy you’re feeling??  (nod your head..)


Let’s get to the main thing: beauty in its purest form is cultivated by an active attention to the heart.   This is where all beauty flows out of.  You can have buck teeth and still radiate if you’re heart has been well-tended to.  I know it sounds cliche, but time and time again, I’ve seen it before my very eyes.   Outward beauty fades.  The make up comes off and OMG WHO IS THAT??….. but the heart doesn’t need cover-up, if it’s given the proper attention.


Don’t be deceived, all the things media shoves at us blurs our eyes to the foundation of grandeur.   Your purpose in life is not to be hot.  Sorry if that’s disappointing.  How many of us have been living like it is our #1 ambition.   Take the pressure off yourself and remind yourself that the label “yummy mummy” is not what you were created to become. You were created to bring life to the dying. You’re “beauty” is for the broken of the world.  Women are natural at bringing healing to those in great need.


It’s time we come back to that purpose, rather than trying to find it in botox treatments.