Author: connie

When your world is full of cliques

I got a message from a friend last week who was having a horrible time with cliques in her son’s school.  With her permission, here’s her experience:   “I’m finding a huge number of cliques have cropped up in our  school. Last night I literally ate alone at our school bbq because these groups were so tightly circled off. I tried to interact with the moms at the school, but it’s tough having to listen to them recount all the fun they had at events I clearly wasn’t invited to.  My son is bearing the brunt of these cliques in school. He’s well-liked by most of his classmates and they all treat him well one-on-one. He’s just not part of any group. Last night he was directly told to “go away” from one of these groups, and was given the cold shoulder by another pair. The two of us left the picnic early. It doesn’t help that we’re relatively new at our church, so we don’t have any close relationships there either.”   Can I be honest for a moment?  This message made my blood boil.  Nothing angers me more than seeing someone being pushed out of the social circle, intentionally or unintentionally.  However, whenever my mind starts to think about what I’d like to do to those ladies, a small voice inside me reminds me how I’ve done...

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Gym Hotties

I once stumbled upon this facebook group, “Gym Hotties”.  This particular picture (one of the most decent I could find) had over 8000 likes and 64 shares.  Another one, much less dressed, had over 11,000 likes and 110 shares. Seems to me, the female body has been stripped of it’s beauty and made an object for viewing pleasure.  If she is pleasureable (which can apparently be numerically shown by numbers of “shares”), she is given status, a stamp of approval, and sometimes even wealth.  Women who measure up fight to keep their “shares”, while others who don’t measure up (at least in society’s standards), lose heart in hopes of ever being “beautiful”. “The problems of standards of beauty is they create standards of ugliness.” – Alan Hirsch There is actually an app on facebook called, “Hot, or so ugly you can’t look at them”. I also stumbled upon this picture recently on facebook: This is a powerful image for those in the personal training/nutrition business.  I mean, who doesn’t look at that picture and think, “Yes!  I want that body!  Somebody help me get it!”   However, I have issues with this.  Serious issues. First of all, notice again the focus is on “the body”.  Yes, it is needed perspective on junk food (enjoyed for moment), but notice there is no mention of the harmful effects of junk food...

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Letter from a frustrated reader: “Your blog reminds me of all I’m not doing”… Do you relate to what she writes?

I received this letter from a reader.  She has given me permission to post this because I feel like this echoes a majority of women – including me! She writes: “I have been a reader of your blog since the beginning. I’m usually inspired and uplifted by the posts. But lately, more often than not, they make me a little cranky. Mad even, sometimes. You have a passion for outreach and that is great! But my passion for, well, anything, has been replaced by responsibility and obligation. I am a full time working single mother with little to no support. If I am caught up on my laundry, that is a huge success. Weekends are filled with chores, errands, visiting with friends long overdue. I have no idea how to fit anything more into my life (and that includes exercise). Reading your blog reminds me of more things I am not doing, that I should do, or at least want to do. It is a struggle to look past my rented apartment door and see the needs of others.  I don’t want to be so self-absorbed, but it is difficult to move past survival mode and take on even one more thing – no matter how noble or worthwhile or necessary to make The World a Better Place. I’m just trying to figure out how to make my world...

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How big is your “but”?

We all have things that we dream about when alone.   Things we’d do, IF.  Can I interrupt that “if” and let you know that “if” is still going to be there the next time you revisit something you’re dying to do.  I read this quote on a status on Facebook the other day:  “A year from now, you’ll wish you would have”. I loved book “The Cause Within You” by Matthew Barnett.   The first thing I saw on the side flap in the book before I even started reading it was this statement: “Nearly half of all adults say they are still seeking the meaning and ultimate purpose of their lives.  Are you one of them?”   After reading that, my heart screamed out; “YES!  I’m one of them!!” Did you scream out “YES!” to that too?  What would you do if nothing limited you?  What’s your “but” look like in regards to stepping out towards it? I’ll tell you what my but looks like.  It’s big.  A great, big BUT: BUT I’m sick of hearing about stepping out and dreaming – especially in a time in my life when I feel my time and energy is limited. BUT what if I fail, waste my time, others time and even my own personal money? BUT what if I need to give up work and income to do...

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What moms worry about… (besides EVERYTHING)

Mommy-worry moment.  You know, when you feel you have to make a decision that’s going to effect your child’s entire future (at the young age of six..)  Yup, I had one of those anxiety attacks this week.  Here’s how it went down: We had applied for my son Ben to attend a spanish school back in February.  We were told he was #7 on the waiting list to get into this coveted school.  We figured that was a done-deal, so we put him in a French school.  Such good Canadian parents 🙂 Second day of Ben in his french school, I get a call from the Spanish school saying there was a space for him!  My heart leaped!  No, you don’t understand.  I LOVE spanish people.  I really wasn’t supposed to be white.  I’m always trying to figure out how to squeeze into the spanish group at my church, but I can’t seem to get past; “Hola” and “tacito”.  Some of my closest friends are spanish.  I love the music and haven’t you noticed that anything sounds better in spanish?  You could tell me to screw off and it would still sound romantic… We felt good about our decision to apply for the Spanish school back in February.  After all, Ben’s first word when he was thirteen months (I kid you not) was, “Hola”.  I’m serious!  Check it out...

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